Brace yourselves. Real life is coming.
If you say “old sport” three times in front of your mirror Gatsby will appear and awkwardly hit on your wife
GUYS I WAS AT THE LEAFS GAME WHEN THIS HAPPENED I WAS CRYING
Wait, when was Mother’s Day? Shit!
When I was little I thought being an adult meant not having a bed time but I’ve come to realize that it just means being in charge of my own bed time and it turns out that I am not equipped to handle that responsibility.
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